Confirmation: Big Girl Shoes are Not for Mrs. B

O.k so I tried the “Big Girl” shoes again. Mrs. B was looking all kinds of cute with her tropical looking dress and leggings to hide the knees. I was looking so good some kids did a second look.  Joking I told them it was all right, that  people mistake me for Beyonce all the time.  The kids laughed uncertainly, looking at me hard to see if I was joking.  Of course I was; that’s just something I say to lighten up the mood at school.

So I get through the day without incident and am beginning to feel confident about my as Trya Banks would say “high fashion” look.  That’s when life took the opportunity to humble me again.

The after school kids run around in the field before they come in to do their math.  Shoot if I wasn’t so much older I’d run around with them.  These kids are bigger than me, but still have fun playing tag and just being plain silly. The weather is nice and the grass is green-while it is snowing in the other states. Three months from now, nobody wants to be outside running around. Naturally, when it is time to come into class they aren’t able to hear the teacher (wink, wink).

This means Mrs. B has to go fetch some children so she can teach them math.  Actually I am kind of liking the idea because that gives me a chance to run around in the grass.  A little problem presents itself-the big girl shoes. I will sink with every step because of the heel. So I take them off and carry them by the straps. The toes are stretching waiting to feel the grass between them.

Four steps out and reality hits.  The grass is green because it has weeds that have little round stickers in them. My mind is saying ouch in three different languages. The arms go in the air like if I raise them higher, I’ll weigh less.  At that moment one of the kids looks up, sees the pain in my face and the strappy sandal in the air and screams to the other kids, “She got out the chankla”  That is spanglish for she is going to whoop us old school style.

They start running to the class like it is safety.  O.k. mission accomplished I turn around. The kids were running so fast they didn’t realize I wasn’t chasing them until they looked back from the class. I still have 10 painful steps until I reach the safety of the cement. My new favorite student comes running back.

“Mrs. B were you really going to hit us with the chankla?”

Now I’m stepping, removing stickers and moving on to the next step. “No I tell him,” and go on to explain that I took off my sandals because I thought I could walk faster on the grass.

“That wasn’t such a smart idea” he says back to me and heads back to the class.

Sometimes the wisdom that comes out of the mouth of babes is scary. I think I’m sticking to the Converse All Stars.

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